The Kitchen: A Never-Ending Love Story

I wanted to take a moment to reflect on the old adage ‘the kitchen is the heart of the home’. While I believe this still holds true, I think some of its nuances have perhaps been lost today. Food really is the way to everyone’s hearts, not least because it quite literally keeps it beating, but because there’s something about the ritual of cooking and eating that engenders safety, comfort, and community. Its importance is synonymous across cultures, it’s the foundations of civilizations, a political instrument, a means for unity, a way of creating peace, a tool in courtship, and one of the biggest love languages of all. The list is endless.

Needless to say, the landscape in which this is all made possible, The Kitchen, has  profound importance in our lives, whatever that may look like. In the most modest of interpretations, this can be merely a source of heat on which food is cooked. For many, it’s a status symbol signalling abundance and skill; why else do we all want a kitchen island? In the modern world no one buys a home without one, but I wonder whether some people don’t fully appreciate the role that The Kitchen can really play in their lives. 

Many people don’t enjoy cooking, or don’t see value in the time they have to spend in the kitchen—seeing it as a necessary, time-stealing, part of their day. Many people treat their kitchen purely as a place where food is stored, meals are cooked. Perhaps it’s too small, too shabby, too ill-fitted to really be a place you want to spend time in. 

And I get that, I’ve been a student for a long time and shared many kitchens, having little control over the environment, what kitchen tools were on offer, when, what and how I could cook. These things are restricting and can make cooking a miserable experience.

But I’m learning—and this is hardly a shock—what the kitchen can give back if you regard it in the right light. I’m not saying you should Feng Shui the s*** out of it. But I am saying that you should truly frame it as the heart of your home. A place that is curated in such a way that you are happy to spend time in it, so that cooking becomes a part of your creative outlet or way of unwinding. It shouldn’t be a last thought when it comes to DIY, or a place where you scuttle away while the rest of the family are waiting eagerly for dinner. 

Short of getting that dream island, consider the decor, the colours, the layout, even at what times you choose to be in it. If DIY isn’t an option, organise your kitchen so that it makes sense to the way you cook and the items you actually use. As Bee Wilson maintains (in regards to knives but I would extend to all kitchen items) the tools you should collecting be are the ones “that you will use the most”.* Keep it tidy and bright in any way you can. Introduce life in the form of plants. Add items that encourage and remind you of community: mugs and glasses on standby, seating if at all possible (I managed to squeeze a tiny sofa in mine!), photos of people you care about and memories you cherish. Make any of your go-to recipe books easily accessible. Introduce speakers, a radio, something that allows you to play music or podcasts while you potter about. Even if you’re missing the cooking gene, then think about it as a place in which you can enjoy making a cup of tea and taking a moment. 

This space should be curated so that it’s on your side, always. If your kitchen had a voice then it would say “of course we should have scrambled eggs for dinner again” or “this is your time, you enjoy that wine that was meant for the risotto”. 

That, my friends, is true love.

*Wilson, Bee, The Secret of Cooking: Recipes for an Easier Life in the Kitchen (London: Fourth Estate Ltd., 2023), p. 125.